Cloudy with a Chance of Optimism

We come upon words that touch our thought. Thoughts that we otherwise push away, differ to the more important aspects of life, at that moment.
Forgetting that what surrounds us, encases us and all the beauty that it truly holds.

We let life cloud the vision of the truer reality that stands before us...beckoning us, if we are listening. Waiting. The most patient mistress we all have within our lives.

Do we listen? Do we heed her foretelling? Her need to share the beauty she holds within our grasp?

How many times dow e go about our daily business, oblivious to our surroundings?

A part of myself that I have always embraced and never really shared, due to when I did share I was given looks of disdain or just that I was being silly. That what I spoke of held no importance in the importance of the daily tasks at hand.
I had and have and do, take those moments and revel in what they hold for me.
The blackbirds and theri dance of flight. Whatever the meaning or what they are truly doing, it is the beauty of that flight that captures me.
The flags along a busy road. Paying no mind to the meaning of that flag and all it encompasses, yet the beauty of how the flag waves, the gentleness of the breeze that calls attention to the meaning that it holds. That slight wave, the unfurling encapsulates that meaning. Making it more important.
I revel in these moments now, an attempt to recapture what I had pushed aside for years. Lost in the minutia of the day. The moment. Lost in the tiredness of living.
These moments alleveating that fatigue.
Creating an optimism for going on. To capture(recapture) something that was lost in days past. Days spent worrying of bills, the drive to work, the moment of existing.

There is beauty in all, in everyday living. Taking the moment it takes to google something, text something...find it, hold it. That is what we take with us. Not the material we surround ourselves with, no. The most precious of life is there for us, we just can't hold it in the palm of our hand.

Why

Watching a television program on NatGeo about the Holocaust. Hitler's Hidden Holocaust. I am not sure the true reason why I watch these events, these horrific acts on human kind. Why documentaries of Hitler, pull me in.
It is not for anything but understanding. Never forgetting.
I see these faces of people, real people. The look in their eyes.
The children who should be grandparents today, and are not. I hate to use the word fascinated ...or enthralled. It is not a drama of fiction, it occurred. For the hour of the program I am entranced in these lives. These lives taken by an ideology I can not understand.
I can not wrap my head around this thought process. Of when it became okay in the minds of those who committed such evil.

I have lived my life on the outside. I blend well.
Always a commentary inside, asking why. It drives me. Hence the degree, the degree that just happened. It wasn't my goal. Was NOT where I wanted my path to go.
I had bigger plans.
And here i sit in the path I chose, the path that came by and I turned.

The human psyche has enchanted me. Not that what we find out is in anyways "happy" or what we think life should be.
It ends dramatically, grossly...places we would choose not be.
Details we as humans have chosen to push away, to not expose ourselves or our minds to any way, shape or form. The reality we avoid. Facing these demons or convincing ourselves of some justification, does not make it go away. Yet destined.


And here these faces 3446 men and women and children found themselves. Or were found to be.

Utter desperation fills cavities of thought.
Hard to shake that feeling.